Belle is a Dyslexic social work student who has written In My Head to describe and explore her experiences as a neurodivergent social work student.
In My Head
In my head is a weird place to be,
Sometimes one thought, often 3.
I hear what is said, I try and take it all in,
And this is where the magic starts to begin.
Will my brain be precise, correct and succinct?
And give the answer to show I can think
Or will I get lost and go off in a stare
And wonder “how do crabs climb up the stair”.
If its too loud, too bright and full-on,
I need to blast my ears with a certain song
To find my calm whilst trapped in an office cage,
To stop from being overwhelmed, into a hulk-like rage.
I can get weary when stuck on long-winded tasks,
It's exhausting always having to wear this mask.
They say 'think before you speak' – like it will get rid of my fear,
If only they knew about the journey of my thoughts, from my mind, to my mouth, to their ear.
At work, at home and in the car, I have cried,
not really understanding what I feel inside.
Am I stupid, why do I get it all wrong,
when I can recite every word from my favourite 90’s song.
No, I am not, I am my mind's own Queen.
No more masking to damage my self-esteem.
I can do empathy, big picture and talk,
To anyone, anywhere, I can walk the walk.
I have skills, neurotypicals study hard to achieve
The secret to my rule is to believe,
I can do the job, learn the skill, win the quiz,
I Maybe not be a spelling bee Whizz.
We are the sparkles you see on the sand
Just cos we live in a neurotypical land,
We are beautiful, we matter, and look how we gleam.
We are the sparkles; and we are here to be seen.
Belle also took part in the Neurodivergent Social Work Voices Campaign. You can check out what she has to say here: https://ndsocialworker.wixsite.com/ndsw/post/16-neurodivergent-social-work-voices-campaign-belle
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